"No Foostar"

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By: Samantha Roberts

2 Timothy 2:23-24, “Don’t have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels. And the Lord’s servant must not quarrel; instead, he must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful.” (NIV)

Katie slammed her cell phone down in anger. Part of her felt a little bad for saying those awful things to her friend, but right now she mostly felt like Brittany deserved every last syllable of it. How dare she go see that movie without her? She knew Katie wanted to see it with her because they had talked about it months ago when the previews first came out. Oh sure, she just “forgot.” Katie was positive it all meant more than that. Well, if that’s the way Brittany wanted to be then fine – she’d just go that concert they had tickets to without her. Two could play this game. She picked up the phone again and searched her contacts for some other number to dial…

In our youth group, we have a name for that. We call it “foostar.”

I know that sounds like some kind of nonsense word out of a children’s book, but to us it speaks the truth of God into our hearts and lives every time we hear it. We made it up by combining the words FOOlish and STupid ARguments from 2 Timothy 2:23, and in our group it’s usually used in one way and one way only: “No foostar.”

We kind of learned the hard way through a season of stressed and broken friendships within our group that foostar has no place in the lives of people who follow Christ. For one thing, arguing over things that really don’t matter is distracting when your mind is supposed to be fixed on things above (see Colossians 3:2). I mean, how much are you really thinking about Jesus when you’re busy fighting?

Foostar can be more than just distracting, though, because those petty little arguments can easily lead to bigger, more destructive quarrels. It’s amazing how quickly something that’s so small and you can hardly remember a week later snowballs into a roadblock so large that your friendship simply can’t navigate around it.

Living out loud for God in this world is tough enough as it is. Through His grace and mercy He hasn’t asked you to do it alone, but has brought friends into your life to strengthen you, encourage you and keep you focused on Him. The absolute last thing you need is for some ridiculous disagreement to wedge its way into one of those friendships and deny you that fellowship.

So here’s the bottom line: It’s way too easy to fall into the trap of arguing with your Christian sisters (and brothers) over things that ultimately don’t matter. Choose today to take a stand against foostar in your life and in the lives of your friends, promising to have absolutely nothing to do with it. If you see it creeping in where it doesn’t belong, simply declare, “No foostar!” and walk away. It’s that easy, and it might just save a friendship from a whole lot of heartache.


Father God, thank You for my friends. Please help us have nothing to do with foolish and stupid arguments so we can focus on You and encourage each other to grow in Your Spirit. In Jesus’ name, Amen.

Related Resources:

Every Teen Girl’s Little Pink Book on Girlfriends, by Cathy Bartel

Wise Up! Experience the Power of Proverbs, by Rebecca Ingram Powell

Think About It:

Can you think of a time when you were involved in a foolish and stupid argument with a friend?

If you can remember how the argument started, was the issue you were fighting over actually worth the heartache it caused both of you?

Live It:

Consider drawing up a contract between you and your closest friends stating that you will have absolutely nothing to do with foolish and stupid arguments. Sign it and agree to hold each other accountable to identifying foostar and walking away from it.

Power Verses:

Romans 12:18, “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” (NIV)

Proverbs 17:9, “You will keep your friends if you forgive them, but you will lose your friends if you keep talking about what they did wrong.” (CEV)

© 2009 by Samantha Roberts. All rights reserved.


Tell Us About It:

Tell us about a time when you were involved in a foolish and stupid argument with a friend. How did you resolve it?

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