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“You were cleansed from your sins when you obeyed the truth, so now you must show sincere love to each other as brothers and sisters. Love each other deeply with all your heart.” 1 Peter 1:22 (NLT)

“OK, but if you lie to me one more time, you know what will happen!” Wow; pretty strong language, I thought. What was going on between these two? One friend, in an effort to cover up some stuff she thought was embarrassing, decided lying would work. The other friend didn’t think so. “If you’re going to lie, we won’t be friends.”

Friendships and boundaries. If you have one, you really need the other. Andy Stanley talks about guardrails; you know, they’re up along the side of the road that keep you from crashing your car? Guardrails in relationships keep you from danger, from losing everything. So what guardrails help us to not lose our friendships that we invest so much in?

Honesty builds and keeps trust in a friendship. How could you have real friendship without honesty?

Confidentiality keeps intimacy in a friendship. How can you share your heart unless you know that what you say to a friend will stay with your friend? My mom always told me, “If someone will talk about someone else to you they will talk about you to someone else.” Be careful of the girl who talks about others; you may just be her next topic of conversation.

Kindness is huge. So often I hear “friends” cutting each other down in the name of just kidding. Sarcasm and rude remarks have no place between friends.
Friendships that last a lifetime are friendships that are invested in. It is much easier to keep a friend than to find a new one. Are you investing in your friendships through honesty, confidentiality and kindness?

Jesus, I guess the place to start with this is to be a great friend. Help me to hear myself when I am dishonest, gossiping or unkind. Make me like You, a friend like no other. In Jesus’ name, Amen.


Visit: Stop by
my blog and let’s discuss what you are looking for in a great friend.

Ponder: 1 Peter 2:1, “So get rid of all evil behavior. Be done with all deceit, hypocrisy, jealousy and all unkind speech.” (NLT)

Apply: Are you the type of friend that can hear a secret and keep a secret? If the answer is “no,” ask yourself, “Why do I want to share someone’s secret? What is my motivation?”

Read: God Girl: Becoming the Woman You’re Meant to Be by Hayley DiMarco

Share: Which of the three traits is your strongest: confidentiality, honesty or kindness? Which one is your weakest? Ask your closest friend what she thinks. Ask her what you can do to become a better friend.

© 2010 by Lynn Cowell. All rights reserved.
A Division of Proverbs 31 Ministries

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