True Confessions: Prayer & Worship

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By: Kristen Sigmon

I've had a hard time praying lately. What's interesting, though, is that even though I haven't been able to verbally express my prayers to God, I have found myself worshiping Him.

I’ve been spending more time on my face in silence with Him. I’ve also been worshiping Him in another way – through music. I love to play the piano. I grew up learning to play from sheet music but never learned how to play by ear. God recently, however, has given me the ability to play by ear, to just sit down at the piano and play a worship song to Him. Not only this, but I’ve also been worshiping Him by listening to Christian songs. Even though I don’t have the words to pray, those songs express what’s on my heart and I find myself praying the lyrics silently to God.

The Bible says that when we don’t know what to pray, the Holy Spirit intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words (
Romans 8:26-27). He prays for us when we can’t. The Bible also says that Jesus sits at the right hand of the Father and intercedes for us (Hebrews 7:24-25, 8:1-2). That’s such a comfort.

God knows where we’re at. He knows our struggles. Also, He is always with us, even though we can’t always feel Him there.

It’s a good practice for us to ask God to search our hearts and show us any areas of sin that we need to confess and turn from. If we’ve done that and still don’t feel His presence, we might just be in a “dark night of the soul” (St. John of the Cross), a place of loneliness and desolation. As my pastor put it recently, sometimes God backs away from us a bit so our faith has a chance to grow. Think about it. “Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen” (Hebrews 11:1).

As for me, in times when I can’t feel God’s presence and prayer is extremely difficult, I will choose to worship. I will remind myself that where I’m at is okay and nothing’s wrong with me. I will remind myself of God’s promises, and I will praise my Promise Keeper God.

When we can truly worship God in the darkest night and despite how our feelings and our enemy scream at us that it’s our fault we don’t feel God, that’s pure worship – to a God who deserves ALL our worship no matter what our circumstances.

I worship You, God.

“Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.”
-1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

© 2010 by Kristen Sigmon. All rights reserved.

Kristen Sigmon loves working in full time ministry, nature walks, memorizing Bible verses, and homemade chocolate chip cookies. Her favorite Bible verse is Ephesians 3:20-21; it reminds her that God is able to do more in and through us than we could ever ask or imagine. She lives in the suburbs of Charlotte, NC with her mom and two dogs.

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Anonymous Anonymous said...

You don't know how much I needed to hear that right now! I am going through the exact same thing and have been struggling thinking I did something wrong. This is just so encouraging! Another crazy thing is that this week i was memorising the verse at the bottom! God is so good! Thank You so much for sharing that with me. RadRev is always in my prayers. God Bless :) ~Megan S.

Anonymous Kristen@RadicalRevolution said...

Megan, it's hard sometimes...especially when the devil tries to convince us that we're not "good enough" Christians and that we ought to be ashamed.

It's wonderful that you're memorizing Scripture! When we can't talk to God, sometimes I think that's just where He wants us so He can speak to us (and us actually hear from Him rather than being preoccupied with our own prayers to Him). He speaks to us especially through the Bible. His Word is truth, which is what we desperately need when the devil's trying to convince us of lies.(to be continued...)

Anonymous Kristen@RadicalRevolution said...

God has been saying to me through His Word that being a Christian is hard and we will face many trials {Acts 14:22}, BUT God is purifying our faith through these {Romans 5:3-5, James 1:2-4}. He's making us stronger for His Kingdom.

In Luke 22:31-32, Jesus says to Peter, "Simon, Simon, Satan has asked to sift [all of] you as wheat. But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers."

Sifting wheat is a refining process of separating the chaff (the useless part) from the wheat. Satan wants to test us & see if we'll walk away from Jesus. Even in times when we can't pray and don't feel God's presence, the devil will try to pull us away from God. But Jesus prays for us that our faith may not fail. (to be continued...)

Anonymous Kristen@RadicalRevolution said...

Shortly after this passage in Luke 22, Peter would deny Jesus three times leading up to His crucifixion. But with remorse and a changed heart, He would turn back to the Lord with a refined heart, even more devoted to His Lord. It's then that God would use Peter as one of the strong founders of the church {see Acts{.

Peter even writes two letters {1 & 2 Peter{ to believers experiencing suffering and persecution for the name of Christ. (Who better to write this than someone who has experienced this himself?) Talk about Peter fulfilling Jesus' words in Luke 22:32, "strengthen your brothers"!

Megan, God is using what you're going through to strengthen you so that you'll be able to strengthen others. So, hang on, and continue to soak up His words to you in the Bible. Jesus is praying for you that your faith may not fail. He's got your back. And I do too. :)


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